.
Feedback

What Do You Have?

A trip to the East Coast challenged my thinking about socio-economics.

The sign said, "Private."

I had been warned about signs like these before I arrived.  In fact, I have seen signs like these in the past when I have been on the East Coast because there are all kinds of properties on which others are not allowed. I did not expect to react to the sign the way that I did on my recent vacation in Rockport, MA. When I saw it for the first time, I thought that I could just let it go. I thought that I would simply ignore it. I thought that I could walk away and not feel anything.

But this time I was so angry …

I was not angry because the sign was there. I was not angry that I could not do as I pleased and continue my walk in another direction with equally beautiful views. I was not angry about what it said. I was angry about what it implied.

Those who can put up signs such as these tend to be those who have. They have something valuable enough to protect behind a sign such as this. They have; therefore, they protect. And the sign implied that I was not someone who has; therefore, I must be a have not. And that thought made me angry.

I want to be someone who has. I want to be a have!

As I walked along the public footpath (for those who do not have), I came to a sobering and humbling realization about myself and my reaction to this sign. 
I am a have. 

To say otherwise would be ridiculous when you consider the following:

  • have enough (probably too much) food to eat on a daily basis.
  • have a house that is heated to my satisfaction during the winter and cooled to my satisfaction during the summer.
  • have (and so does my husband) a job.

And the list could go on … and in considering the list, I realized that I do not want to be a have. I want to be a have more. It is not those who have who put up signs like this because I am a have, and I have nothing valuable enough (like a potentially AMAZING view of the Atlantic Ocean from my backyard—yes, still struggling with this!) to put up a sign that keeps people away from my valuable things. But those who have more than I do are in that situation which is clearly shown by these types of signs.

Please do not comment that this is a normal reaction due to human nature and that it is reasonable for me to respond this way. Sure—I’ll buy that it is normal human behavior to have what we want. It’s called sin, and it is not reasonable at all. It is thankless and selfish for me to consider myself a have not when I am clearly a have

In fact, I think – were I truly a have not and were reading this post – I would be upset with me after reading all that I have.

What I mean to say is that I need to be thankful for what I have and not to want more than what I need. I am not condemning those who have more in this post either—please don’t hear that. But whatever we have, we are responsible to use well. What I have—what more I have than I need for daily use—needs to be used well. I need to consider how best to use the resources I have.

More than that, though, I really needed this lesson in thankfulness because I am so clearly a have.

How do we stay content with what we have when we are confronted with those who seem to have more? How do we walk away from the temptation to follow what the have mores are doing when we do not have the resources but might have the credit to do so? How can we use what we have to better the lives of those who have not?

These were the questions that plagued me throughout my time of rest … and I hope that they continue to plague me even when I am miles away from these signs.

Newsletter & Alerts

Get the best stories each day and important breaking news

Subscribe

Not from Fridley Patch? Find your Local Patch »

Amy Reierson August 1, 2012 at 11:05 pm
I think being grateful is something more people need to strive to be. I think wanting more is something people can use to set goals, they don't need to be looked at like haves and have nots.
What we all forget is that while we all have needs and wants, if all of our needs are met that reaching out to those in need before fulfilling our wants can be more rewarding then anything we obtain as a want. And do we really want what is behind the sign or do we just want it because someone said NO?
Laurie Buck August 2, 2012 at 04:56 am
Kind of reminds me of this:
Signs Signs Everywhere there's signs Blocking up the scenery Breaking up my mind Do this Don't do that Can't you read the sign? And the sign says "Anybody caught trespassing will be shot on sight" So I jumped the fence and I yelled at the house What gives you the right? To put up a fence And keep me out Or to keep Mother Nature in If God was here He'd tell it to your face Man You're some kind of sinner.. And the sign says "Everybody welcome Come in Kneel down and pray" But then they passed around a plate at the end of it all And I didn't have a penny to pay So I got me a pen and paper And I made up my own little sign I said Thank you Lord for thinking about me I'm alive and doing fine... (Songwriters: CRADDOCK, BRIAN / NADOLSKI, DAVID MICHAEL / NADOLSKI, MATTHEW JOSEPH)
Stacy Bender August 2, 2012 at 01:01 pm
Great thoughts so far! Thank you so much for reading and for responding. :)
Amy: your last line is completely convicting. There is a follow up post coming...
Barry LeBlanc August 13, 2012 at 01:21 pm
Hi, grew up in Beverly Mass, born in Salem. The signs that you read are very common ...I could not understand it either but private signs are also on lakes in Minnesota / WI mean the same..I was just on Bone Lake, Luck WI and very lucky a friend on a cabin with 200 foot lake frontage and guess what..There are signs along waters edge too keep off, so it is just not one area of the country, it is the HAVES that will always have...just like the ST Croix, Hubbard broadcasting knock off a hill and built a mansion over looking the River and takes his 100 foot yacht up to Stillwater for dinner...Talk about carbon foot print...count me in with the want to have but thankful for what I have...and I am rich with Family and friends...the wants...I can wait for that Lottery ticket winning!
Stacy Bender August 13, 2012 at 05:23 pm
I lived in Bev-ah-lee for 4 yrs. Love it! And I agree about the lakes...
Barry LeBlanc August 13, 2012 at 06:45 pm
What part of Bev a lee?
I lived ikn Ryal Side and was raised on 25 Rowell Ave, near Livingston and Bridge Street, now live in Richfield...love the pace of life after leaving Beverly I lived in 14 different states...and found Minnesota home, not the push or shove opf the east cost, Or How I call it EAST COAST LOVE...miss chez steaks, little neck clams. The clam box and Pizza...here is my email address: drop me a line barry0404@yahoo.com
Note Article
Just a short thought to get the word out quickly about anything in your neighborhood.
Share something with your neighbors. Write a new post... What's up? Make an announcement, speak your mind, or sell something
Mike B. June 17, 2013 at 03:56 pm
Sad to say, the Minnesota budget will drive more Minnesota families and businesses out of thisRead More state. The Democrat Party has enacted a far-left wing agenda. New business start-ups in Minnesota continue to decline. Why should a business invest in a state with confiscatory taxes? Wisconsin and the Dakotas, with excellent Republican governors are attracting business and top-flight workers, while Minnesota stagnates at best.
Fridley Parks & Recreation June 9, 2013 at 06:56 am
For complete rules on how to participate visit the City's web site:Read More http://ci.fridley.mn.us/images/article-files/parksandrec/49erdays/Fridley_Idol_Rules.pdf
Fridley Parks & Recreation June 9, 2013 at 07:01 am
For rules and detailed information on the contest visit the City's web site:Read More http://ci.fridley.mn.us/49er-days/fridley-idol
Dan Johnson June 12, 2013 at 05:50 pm
Candace. Religious groups currently perform same sex marriages, as they have in the past. RequiringRead More a religious ceremony for a marriage does not solve your problem of same sex marriages. It only denies marriage to non-believers. And would you include every religion? Or just those of which you approve? Same sex marriage is nothing new. Despite your lack of information, same sex couples have been getting married throughout history, and marriage has taken many other forms as well in addition to the 8 types found in the bible. Dire predictions of collapse do not show how treating all persons equally under the law results in the loss of freedom rather than the expansion of it.
Dan Johnson June 12, 2013 at 06:14 pm
Donald. We can agree on liking better, the old format that allows direct replies. Strange youRead More would accuse Mike H. of seeking a utopia, and then describe your childhood experience where all conflicts are successfully resolved by the parties involved, without the help of adult intervention. Most of us lived in a very different reality, where bullies were often tolerated if not encouraged by many adults, and some kids suffer severe harm which results in suicide for more than a few. While I don't support "zero tolerance" laws or policies that expel all kids who are involved in a physical altercation, I support adult intervention in all such events. They should be used to teach civilized conflict resolution, anger management, and assess the need for any other intervention. Kids who bully are often learning it at home through being abused. Did you skip reading "Lord of the Flies"?
Dan Johnson June 12, 2013 at 06:25 pm
I also miss paragraphs.
Dan Johnson June 4, 2013 at 06:10 pm
American Academy of Pediatrics: "The terms reparative therapy and sexual orientation conversionRead More therapy refer to counseling and psychotherapy aimed at eliminating or suppressing homosexuality. The most important fact about these “therapies” is that they are based on a view of homosexuality that has been rejected by all the major mental health professions. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders,6 published by the American Psychiatric Association, which defines the standards of the field, does not include homosexuality. All other major health professional organizations have supported the American Psychiatric Association in its declassification of homosexuality as a mental disorder in 1973. Thus, the idea that homosexuality is a mental disorder or that the emergence of same-sex attraction and orientation among some adolescents is in any way abnormal or mentally unhealthy has no support among any mainstream health and mental health professional organizations. The idea that homosexuality is a mental disorder or that the emergence of same-sex attraction and orientation among some adolescents is in any way abnormal or mentally unhealthy has no support among any mainstream health and mental health professional organizations."
Dan Johnson June 4, 2013 at 06:12 pm
"Despite the general consensus of major medical, health, and mental health professions thatRead More both heterosexuality and homosexuality are normal expressions of human sexuality, efforts to change sexual orientation through therapy have been adopted by some political and religious organizations and aggressively promoted to the public. However, such efforts have serious potential to harm young people because they present the view that the sexual orientation of lesbian, gay, and bisexual youth is a mental illness or disorder, and they often frame the inability to change one’s sexual orientation as a personal and moral failure. Because of the aggressive promotion of efforts to change sexual orientation through therapy, a number of medical, health, and mental health professional organizations have issued public statements about the dangers of this approach. The American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Counseling Association, the American Psychiatric Association, the American Psychological Association, the American School Counselor Association, the National Association of School Psychologists, and the National Association of Social Workers, together representing more than 480,000 mental health professionals, have all taken the position that homosexuality is not a mental disorder and thus is not something that needs to or can be “cured.” The American Academy of Pediatrics advises youth that counseling may be helpful for you if you feel confused about your sexual identity. Avoid any treatments that claim to be able to change a person’s sexual orientation, or treatment ideas that see homosexuality as a sickness." AAP
Dan Johnson June 4, 2013 at 06:31 pm
Ironically, much of the research showing orientation is not a choice, comes from failed efforts toRead More change it. Not only have such efforts shown efforts to change orientation are not successful, but that they are often harmful to the point of self destructive behavior including suicide. "Contrary to claims of sexual orientation change advocates and practitioners, there is insufficient evidence to support the use of psychological interventions to change sexual orientation," said Judith M. Glassgold, PsyD, chair of the task force. "Scientifically rigorous older studies in this area found that sexual orientation was unlikely to change due to efforts designed for this purpose. Contrary to the claims of SOCE practitioners and advocates, recent research studies do not provide evidence of sexual orientation change as the research methods are inadequate to determine the effectiveness of these interventions." Glassgold added: "At most, certain studies suggested that some individuals learned how to ignore or not act on their homosexual attractions. Yet, these studies did not indicate for whom this was possible, how long it lasted or its long-term mental health effects. Also, this result was much less likely to be true for people who started out only attracted to people of the same sex." APA Based on this review, the task force recommended that mental health professionals avoid misrepresenting the efficacy of sexual orientation change efforts when providing assistance to people distressed about their own or others' sexual orientation."
Tom May 31, 2013 at 12:20 pm
As I said earlier " if all goes well we will end the 49er days festival with fireworks onRead More Sunday, June 30th" Unfortunately all did not go well and we will not be able to have the fireworks this year. It takes a lot of donations to run a festival this large, so maybe if we get an early start for next year we will end the 2014 49er Day's Festival with a bang. Also we still could use some volunteers to help at tome of the functions during the festival. If you are able to volunteer, call Tom Bourque at 603-548-3958
David F May 3, 2013 at 03:02 am
We (parents) have created the hyper competitiveness of amateur sports. Pressure on coaches is aboutRead More winning, not too many coaches get fired who win state championships. . The measure that USA Hockey uses to assess the advancement of skill levels of US players is how many reach the NHL. The state legislature is trying to solve a problem even though they cannot define what the problem is.
J Johnson May 9, 2013 at 10:52 pm
The writer of this bill, Dean Urdahl, has gone on the record that NO coach has ever lost his job inRead More Minnesota based only on parent complaints - so why all the fuss and sense of need to do something? What Leah seems to think is the opinion of many parents and she is very wrong. Hasn't everyone read the news reports of coaches who abuse players, who steal from the school district, who are horrible with kids, who choose teams based on which parents will contribute $ to the program? This ILLEGAL behavior routinely happens in practically every school district. This legislation is a shield for bad coaches. Never heard of a good coach, who treats players with respect and who works on skill improvement in positive ways ever being let go. School districts and bad coaches put duct tape over their mouths to avoid the scandal that would result if the community knew what was happening on some high school teams. AD's, principals and school boards already have plenty of policies in place that make it almost impossible to fire employees - why do coaches need more protection than the lunch ladies, custodians, aides, teachers and support staff? The answer is they don't and this whole thing is a ploy to keep the good old boys network of bad coaches in their positions.
Orono May 20, 2013 at 06:06 pm
My son attends a school with the opposite situation. He attends a private school, competion toRead More attract new students can get severe. His school has gotten caught up in the desire to be a player in the sports arena in an effort to gain more students. While I admire the desire to become more competitive, when you dont have enough kids to field a football team, being competitve shouldnt be your first priority. The school has recently gone away from teachers being coaches to hiring outside the school. They recently hired a baseball coach that used to play professionally. When he is not coaching highschool, he runs a baseball academy. He cant live off only his coaching salary. His baseball academy is his bread and butter. It costs about $4000 to attend this academy. Half the academy was made up of his own highschool players. The players that paid the money and attended the academy played all the innings during the highschool season. The school was left with a huge black eye and was forced to replace him. The school has a senior class of only 70 kids (boys and girls) to begin with. It seems the math teacher who used to coach the team didnt have a sexy enough resume to attract outside students. The fiasco caused many average kids who couldnt afford the academy to quit. Now the school has even fewer kids playing and is forced to play underclassmen at the varsity level to fill the roster. Making a bad team even worse.
Russell Jones April 26, 2013 at 03:13 am
I agree with Ms. Powell, the cops have encrypted frequencies they can use that aren't available toRead More scanners. If the cops don't use them it's their mistake. The majority of communication should be allowed since law enforcement is paid for by our tax dollars making it publicly owned. The people have a right to know what their government is doing!
Penny May 18, 2013 at 05:25 am
Explore the latest women's bag collections exclusively available atRead More http://pinterest.com/louisvuittonlv/. Louis Vuitton Spring Summer 2013 Show your fashion style now!
Michael Hindin May 23, 2013 at 04:45 pm
Private channels are often difficult to arrange when you have multiple agencies involved. In thisRead More area there has been much progress in having compatible communication between different emergency responders. Cell phones help when time is not an issue.